* "A Better You" Your 7 days program to self-improvement By Titus Maduwa

 I seem to lost count on how many times I've read and heard of celebrity marriages failing almost left and right. Not that I care (and personally I don't), it seems strange that we often see movie and TV stars as flawless people, living the fairy tale life of riches and glamour. I suppose we all have to stop sticking our heads in the clouds and face reality.

There are many ways to lose your sense of self-esteem despite of how trivial it could get. But whatever happens, we should all try not to lose our own sense of self.

So what does it take to be a cut above the rest? Here are some of the things you can think and improve on that should be enough for a week.

1. Know your purpose 

Are you wandering through life with little direction - hoping that you'll find happiness, health and prosperity? Identify your life purpose or mission statement and you will have your own unique compass that will lead you to your truth north every time.

This may seem tricky at first when you see yourself to be in a tight or even dead end. But there's always that little loophole to turn things around and you can make a big difference to yourself.

2. Know your values 

What do you value most? Make a list of your top 5 values. Some examples are security, freedom, family, spiritual development, learning. As you set your goals for 2005 - check your goals against your values. If the goal doesn't align with any of your top five values - you may want to reconsider it or revise it.

The number shouldn't discourage you, instead it should motivate you to do more than you can ever dreamed of.

3. Know your needs 

Unmet needs can keep you from living authentically. Take care of yourself. Do you have a need to be acknowledged, to be right, to be in control, to be loved? There are so many people who lived their lives without realizing their dreams and most of them end up being stressed or even depressed for that matter. List your top four needs and get them met before it's too late!

4. Know your passions 

You know who you are and what you truly enjoy in life. Obstacles like doubt and lack of enthusiasm will only hinder you, but will not derail your chance to become the person you ought to be. Express yourself and honor the people who has inspired you to become the very person you wanted to be.

5. Live from the inside out 

Increase your awareness of your inner wisdom by regularly reflecting in silence. Commune with nature. Breathe deeply to quiet your distracted mind. For most of us city slickers it's hard to even find the peace and quiet we want even in our own home. In my case I often just sit in a dimly lit room and play some classical music. There's sound, yes, but music does soothe the savage beast.

6. Honor your strengths 

What are your positive traits? What special talents do you have? List three - if you get stuck, ask those closest to you to help identify these. Are you imaginative, witty, good with your hands? Find ways to express your authentic self through your strengths. You can increase your self-confidence when you can share what you know to others.

7. Serve others 

When you live authentically, you may find that you develop an interconnected sense of being. When you are true to who you are, living your purpose and giving of your talents to the world around you, you give back in service what you came to share with others -your spirit - your essence. The rewards for sharing your gift with those close to you is indeed rewarding, much more if it were to be the eyes of a stranger who can appreciate what you have done to them.

Self-improvement is indeed one type of work that is worth it. It shouldn't always be within the confines of an office building, or maybe in the four corners of your own room. The difference lies within ourselves and how much we want to change for the better.

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# 1 International Author Titus Maduwa

* Your 5 minutes daily program to Stress management By Titus Maduwa

We all have this favorite expression when it comes to being stressed out, and I wouldn't bother naming all of them since it may also vary in different languages. But when it comes down to it, I think that it is how we work or even relax, for that matter that triggers stress. Ever been stressed even when you're well relaxed and bored? I know I have.

Since Error! Hyperlink reference not valid. is unavoidable in life, it is important to find ways to decrease and prevent stressful incidents and decrease negative reactions to stress. Here are some of the things that can be done by just remembering it, since life is basically a routine to follow like brushing your teeth or eating breakfast. You can do a few of them in a longer span of time, but as they say-- every minute counts.

Managing time

Time management skills can allow you more time with your family and friends and possibly increase your performance and productivity. This will help reduce your stress.

To improve your time management:

· Save time by focusing and concentrating, delegating, and scheduling time for yourself. 

· Keep a record of how you spend your time, including work, family, and leisure time. 

· Prioritize your time by rating tasks by importance and urgency. Redirect your time to those activities that are important and meaningful to you. 

· Manage your commitments by not over- or under-committing. Don't commit to what is not important to you. 

· Deal with procrastination by using a day planner, breaking large projects into smaller ones, and setting short-term deadlines. 

· Examine your beliefs to reduce conflict between what you believe and what your life is like. 

Build healthy coping strategies

It is important that you identify your coping strategies. One way to do this is by recording the stressful event, your reaction, and how you cope in a stress journal. With this information, you can work to change unhealthy coping strategies into healthy ones-those that help you focus on the positive and what you can change or control in your life.

Lifestyle

Some behaviors and lifestyle choices affect your stress level. They may not cause stress directly, but they can interfere with the ways your body seeks relief from stress. Try to:

· Balance personal, work, and family needs and obligations. 

· Have a sense of purpose in life. 

· Get enough sleep, since your body recovers from the stresses of the day while you are sleeping. 

· Eat a balanced diet for a nutritional defense against stress. 

· Get moderate exercise throughout the week. 

· Limit your consumption of alcohol. 

· Don't smoke. 

Social support

Social support is a major factor in how we experience stress. Social support is the positive support you receive from family, friends, and the community. It is the knowledge that you are cared for, loved, esteemed, and valued. More and more research indicates a strong relationship between social support and better mental and physical health.

Changing thinking

When an event triggers negative thoughts, you may experience fear, insecurity, anxiety, depression, rage, guilt, and a sense of worthlessness or powerlessness. These emotions trigger the body's stress, just as an actual threat does. Dealing with your negative thoughts and how you see things can help reduce stress.

· Thought-stopping helps you stop a negative thought to help eliminate stress. 

· Disproving irrational thoughts helps you to avoid exaggerating the negative thought, anticipating the worst, and interpreting an event incorrectly. 

· Problem solving helps you identify all aspects of a stressful event and find ways to deal with it. 

· Changing your communication style helps you communicate in a way that makes your views known without making others feel put down, hostile, or intimidated. This reduces the stress that comes from poor communication. Use the assertiveness ladder to improve your communication style. 

Even writers like me can get stressed even though we're just using our hands to do the talking, but having to sit for 7 or 8 hours is already stressful enough and have our own way to relieve stress. Whether you're the mail guy, the CEO, or probably the average working parent, stress is one unwanted visitor you would love to boot out of your homes, especially your life.

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# 1 International Author Titus Maduwa

Improve Your Personal Life by Looking at the Entire Picture

Have you watched The Movie "LIMITLESS"? It's about a writer who takes an experimental drug that allows him to use 100 percent of his brain, with his heightened brain activity, all of his senses become tuned in to everything in his surrounding environment, he can recall everything he has seen and heard, he can learn exponentially faster, and he is able to outsmart and out-talk people. That's what that movie goes well my question is "Can one person really Improve his/her Personal Life by Looking at the Entire Picture?" Hmmmmmp!!! Sounds like a "Birds Eye View" for me- but what is bird's-eye view? Wikipedia defines it as an elevated view of an object from above, with a perspective as though the observer were a bird, often used in the making of blueprints, floor plans and maps. Well that means to improve your personal life you have to consider yourself as a whole pie. You have to review your liability, behaviors, actions, emotional responses, and overall standard of living. Once you review the details, you will find it easier to move ahead and make the necessary changes. To get started begin with a checklist.

How are your behaviors?
What are your behaviors? Do you engage in activities that lead toward negative consequences? Do you drink heavily? Do you drug? Do you smoke? Do you associate with the wrong people?
Once you write down your behaviors that pull down consider the details. If you engage in activities that lead toward negative consequences, likely you are not looking at the whole pie. Rather you may act before you speak or do something. What you need to do is to consider consequences before you speak or act. If you drink heavily, perhaps you have an alcohol problem. There is nothing wrong with admitting you have a problem. You will need to seek help. There is nothing wrong with seeking help. If you have a drug problem, you will need to apply the same rules mentioned when handling alcoholism. If you smoke, you want to consider ways to stop. You will need willpower and the goal to quite. If you associate with the wrong people, you will need to evaluate your situation. What do these people bring to your table? Do they give or take from you?

How do you handle problems?
Every day there is some kind of a problem that has to be thought out and decided what to do about the issue. What are some things that you can go to help? You should always think out the problem before you make a decision on the issue. You will make healthier decisions by looking at the entire picture. If the problem is too big for you to handle alone, ask for help. Talk with friends, family, or experts.

Do you pay bills on time?
Do you pay bills on time? Paying bills is a major problem that leads to many hassles. If you pay your bills on time however, you can reduce some of these hassles. Failing to pay bills only builds stress. You will need to set a budget that works within your means to pay your bills on time. Maybe you can get a better paying job, so you make more money.
There might be some times that you are late but you should try to keep up as best as you can this will help take off some stress.
Do you visit your doctor regularly?
Keeping your doctor visits and exercising will help relieve stress. Visiting your doctor regularly will help you keep an eye on your health. Healthy people live a productive life.
What actions do you take to improve your life?
As long as you think things out before you make a decision you will work to improve your personal life. You will also need to take steps to reduce stress, by avoiding harmful actions, such as smoking, drugs, or alcoholism. You can benefit by paying bills on time, visiting your doctor, exercise the mind and body daily and so on.
If you have problems quitting on your own, remember help is available. You have many options, including inpatient services, outpatient services, group support, one-on-one services and more. To learn more about these services go online. You will also find help at local government agencies in your area.
To improve your life you can also volunteer to help someone. You can wrap a gift this year for a homeless or handicapped child.

Quote to live by:
The totality of a record is usually beyond ones' ability to imagine when you start working on it, but the component parts are, usually, fairly clear one way or another. - Fred Frith

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